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| Photo by Quang Nguyen Vinh |
When I was a teenager, there was a boy who liked me. He invited me to go swimming in a popular river in the community we lived in. Now, that river was a place my parents warned us never to go near. My mum was especially strict about it. She used to say the river didn’t like non-indigenes, and there had been quite a few deaths connected to it. I remember she even warned my brother seriously when he once mentioned going there. I think they even announced in church for parents to tell their children to stay away.
Interestingly, that same river was where I got baptized—though in a different area, the sand dredging site that’s more controlled. But still, this boy kept asking, and one day when my parents were out, I followed him—and a few others—to the river.
Now that I think of it, neither of us knew how to swim. We were young and just wanted to have fun, but looking back now, it was such a dangerous thing to do. The part of the river we went to was near an abandoned school. We just got in the water and stayed there for a while. I even went near a narrow part at one point, not knowing how risky it was. Thank God nothing happened.
Afterward, I rushed home, took my bath, applied some cream, and acted like nothing had happened—because my mum could always tell when someone had been in the water. She’s from Rivers State, so she just had that sensitivity. She used to look at my brother and say, “You went to that river,” and she’d be really upset.
As for me, I never dipped my head, so my face stayed dry, no red eye, and looked normal. I didn’t even have proper swimwear—just regular clothes and a change of clothes. But what’s interesting is that even though I didn’t dip my head, whenever my mum came back, she would still look at me like she sensed something was off. She was that perceptive.
We did that three times—completely unsupervised. Looking back now, I know I didn’t act wisely at all. It was careless and dangerous.
So I just want to thank Him for His mercy and protection. Even when I was unaware, He was watching over me.
The Denim Factor: Versatility is Key
What makes these cargo pants particularly versatile is the denim fabric. Denim is a timeless staple, I think I have said this like a million times on the blog, hahaha. It can be dressed up or down, making these jeans a fantastic addition to any wardrobe. The wash is classic, providing a great foundation for various styling options.
My Styling Approach: High-Low Chic
For this look, I wanted to play with the high-low trend, pairing the casual utility of the cargo pants with more elevated pieces. Here's the breakdown:
- The Jeans: The star of the show. The KnowFashionStyle denim cargo jeans with their mid-waist, flare leg, and pocket button details. The fit is comfortable yet stylish, allowing for ease of movement while still looking put-together.
- The Sweater: I opted for a cozy, slightly oversized knit sweater. This adds a touch of softness and warmth, balancing the more structured feel of the denim. You could go for a chunky knit for a more relaxed vibe or a fitted sweater for a sleeker look. Trending sweater styles right now include textured knits, pastel shades, and interesting necklines. I was not in the mood to do much; most times when I feel this way, I just go for loose clothing.
- The Heels: This is where the "high" comes in. Pairing these cargo pants with high heels instantly elevates the look, making it more chic and unexpected. Pointed-toe pumps, strappy heels, or even heeled boots would work beautifully. This juxtaposition of casual bottoms with dressy footwear is a key trend we're seeing everywhere – it's all about that effortless cool-girl aesthetic. This heel is not particularly comfortable, but since I don't wear heels for extended periods, I'm fine with it.
Why This Outfit Works (and Why It's Trending):
- Embracing the Utility Trend: Cargo pants are undeniably back in a big way. Designers are showcasing them in various fabrics and silhouettes, and street style stars are rocking them with everything from sneakers to stilettos.
- The Power of Denim: Denim remains a fashion constant, and incorporating it into a trendy silhouette like cargo pants makes it feel fresh and modern.
- High-Low Styling: The contrast between the casual cargo pants and the sophisticated heels creates a visually interesting and fashion-forward look. This high-low mix is a major trend that allows for personal expression and versatility.
- Comfort Meets Style: This outfit manages to be both comfortable and stylish. The relaxed fit of the cargo pants and the cozy sweater ensure comfort, while the heels and the overall styling add a touch of glamour.
Largs is a seaside town on the Clyde coast, about 40 minutes from Glasgow. Its old Gaelic name means "the slopes." It’s a popular spot with a pier and takes pride in its Viking history, celebrated with a festival every September. The town is also historically significant as the site of the Battle of Largs in 1263, where the Scots faced the Norwegians.
1. Kelburn Castle and Estate
A popular attraction for children is the Secret Forest—a fairy tale-themed maze featuring a witch’s cottage and a giant’s castle. There are also the Adventure Course and Saloon play areas, equipped with wooden walkways, stepping stones, tunnels, swings, and a scramble net.
Kelburn’s stunning woodland glen has a network of winding trails to explore, with various creative surprises along the way. Reaching the top of the glen rewards visitors with impressive views across the Firth of Clyde to the Isle of Arran.
In 2007, Kelburn’s castle was painted in a unique style and is now recognized by author and designer Tristan Manco as one of the world’s top 10 examples of street art—comparable to the work of Banksy in Los Angeles and the Favela Morro da Providência in Rio de Janeiro.
The estate hosts events throughout the year, so it’s worth checking their website or social media for updates. Accommodation is available in the form of hillside yurts for glamping, and there are also areas for pitching tents if you prefer to bring your own.
Entry to the grounds, glen, and the Saloon and Adventure Course play areas is free, with a £5 parking charge per car. There is a separate £3 per person entry fee for the Secret Forest. Kelburn Estate and Country Centre is located off the A78, about two miles from Largs, between Largs and Fairlie, and there's a bus stop right outside the entrance. A general entrance fee applies to the estate, with reduced rates in the off-season. The estate also features several walking trails of varying lengths and difficulty. Ranger Services, including guided walks, are available. More details can be found on their website at www.kelburnestate.com. West Kilbride Golf Links borders the northern end of the beach in the vicinity.
The castle wasn’t open when we visited, but we were told that it would be open in June and July. We still enjoyed taking photos around the outside, even though we couldn’t go in.
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2. Waterfall and rock pool at Kelburn Castle and Estate
The Waterfall Pool, set within a striking sandstone grotto, is just 250 yards from the brightly painted castle. The waterfall felt almost unreal—I actually let out a lovely scream near it because I was so excited. It was such a beautiful sight to see in person. Thereafter, we wandered around the estate toward the castle area, strolled through the flower section, and then had some Easter bread before heading to Largs Yacht Haven.
Psalm 16:8: I have set the LORD always before me: because he is at my right hand, I shall not be moved.
Psalm 100:5 says, For the Lord is good; his steadfast love endures forever, and his faithfulness to all generations.
Body image is such a big deal these days. Yesterday, while having a destress day with my partner at Loch Lomond, I carried the book "Body Confident You, Body Confident Kid" by Dr. Charlotte Ord.
Before I even started reading, I browsed through the entire book. I wanted to understand how it was structured. This also helped me get to know more about Dr. Ord. As I read, her intentions became clear. Books like this are essential for parents, especially those who are struggling with their own body image. This can happen at any point in life. Although I haven't finished it yet, some chapters really grabbed my attention.
One thing I've always known is that a parent's struggle with body image can be passed on to their child. On the other hand, confident and positive parents tend to raise confident kids. In a society where everyone compares themselves and strives for an outward appearance of perfection, being a confident parent can make a huge difference for your children. Never underestimate the knowledge your kids gain from you. They learn primarily by observing how you carry yourself.
For me, my parents always told us we were beautiful. My mom consistently praised herself and talked about how lovely she looked. This really built my confidence. Because of this foundation, you can't tell me anything negative about myself. I know I am beautiful. This feeling held true even when I had a girl around me during medical school. She constantly tried to undermine my confidence. She would say things like, "Oh, you're so slim and have no flesh. Your breasts are small; what will a man touch? You don't have big bums, what will a man grab?" She was constantly trying to destroy my confidence because she saw how confident I was. I always wondered why.
Mind you, I have never had any issue with this girl, not for one day.
However, knowing what I know now, she was projecting her own insecurities onto me. Facially, she wasn't ugly. In fact, she was also beautiful, though not as beautiful as me – and I say that as a matter of fact. She was a larger woman, with good height and nice skin, but she had very low self-esteem. This led her to try and belittle me with her words. One of her friends even laughed and said she was jealous of me and wanted to look like me, which is why she always had something negative to say.
I knew that. However, there's more to the situation. She constantly talked about her boyfriend at the time, saying he liked thick women and could never be attracted to someone like me. I honestly didn't care about his preferences. Yet, somehow, I was always the topic of her conversations— always on her lips. Eventually, he ended up asking me out, and I definitely wasn't going to let that slide. Here's how it unfolded:
We all lived in the same house. I was in the kitchen one day when he came up to me and said I looked sad. I was sad because I had just received bad news that made it feel like my world was falling apart. I had failed my first trial after a lot of studying. One day, I'll share that experience and how it shaped me for life. To make the story short, he offered me a hug. While I initially thought it was a harmless gesture, his grip was uncomfortably tight. I thought, "Maybe this is just how he hugs," but he wasn't letting go. I had to physically pull away. Before this incident, he would frequently comment on my hair in the kitchen, saying things like, "Oh, your hair is beautiful, can I touch it?" in a way that was more personal than just a compliment. I would always respond with a simple "thank you." He commented on my style sense a lot—not in the right manner but in more of an I like you way, but I never took it to heart.
After the hug incident, I packed my things and moved out of the house I shared with his girlfriend the next day. She was angry about the way I left, even though our other friend, who also lived there, told her I left because of her actions. She never understood what our friend meant.
That girl tried to bring me down and criticize my features, which were the same features her boyfriend was attracted to. He ended up dating a woman who had my body type. "He left her in a disrespectful way." She found out from her friends that he was dating another woman.
There are many people who struggle internally. Instead of seeking help, they create fake accounts on social media and insult others. Some have friends they admire, but instead of complimenting them, they constantly bring them down and give bad advice. Sadly, those friends might not realize it until it's too late. People who never let you make your own choices, always deeming yours as bad and only theirs as good, often suffer from low self-esteem. I've experienced this firsthand. I can confidently say that my parents did an excellent job of complimenting every aspect of me. Today, no one can tell me anything negative about myself. I know I am beautiful, and that's the end of the story. If you don't like my size, take it up with God.
"Body Confident You, Body Confident Kid" is such an inspiring read. It doesn't just focus on body-confident parents but also on how to raise body-confident kids. One thing I particularly appreciate about the book is the exercises you can do with your child.
On page 216, she discusses how exercise is often viewed as purely a physical process by many. Exercise can be tough for some kids, and not just physically. If you don't feel like you have the "ideal" body, have sensory sensitivities, or aren't naturally athletic, gym class and sports can make you feel more self-conscious and ashamed. It's like you're already worried about how you look or what you can do, and then exercise just shines a spotlight on all of that.
Plus, let's be real, working out can suck. It can hurt, you get all sweaty and out of breath, and it's just plain uncomfortable sometimes. So, it makes total sense that as kids get older and start thinking more about themselves, they're like, "Nah, I'm good on that."
It's like we're wired to avoid pain, right? Whether it's your muscles burning or feeling embarrassed. And for a lot of kids, exercise is both of those things rolled into one. It's even worse when some adult is telling you exactly what to do and how hard to push yourself, like in PE. You can't even listen to your own body and what feels okay.
The writer also added that she even remembers this time in school when everyone had to run this super- long race. She was into sports and loved the challenge, but she saw other kids just chilling and chatting their way through it. At the time, she didn't get it. But now she realizes that those kids just didn't care about winning or pushing themselves like she did. They valued hanging out with their friends more than some dumb race, and they were smart enough to not do something that felt bad.