Wednesday, February 1

How to date yourself.

It can be scary to spend time alone with ourselves. Most of us tend to fill our time regularly with things like work, side projects, freelance jobs, hobbies, and, most of the time, other people.

Even though it can be nice to get away from the noise of other people sometimes, it is hard to do this for a long time. We don't mind having our own thoughts, but we don't really want to be alone with them either.

But maybe there is something to how we choose to talk to ourselves when we're by ourselves. When we're with good people, we're usually happy to spend money on things like wine bars, meals out, live music, and movies. All of these things are fun to do by yourself, but we don't want to. So, as payback, here are some tips on how to date yourself.

Make each day feel fresh.

When and where you go on dates with yourself can be hard to figure out. A good way to start can be to do something you do every day in a new place, which gives your routine a new feel. Instead of going to the gym, try working from a new coffee shop, walking around the park without your phone, or cooking a meal at home instead of ordering in.

Make plans ahead of time.

Tell your friends you're busy, put a block on your Google calendar, and try to keep this time slot, just like you wouldn't want a date to cancel on you at the last minute.

Prepare yourself to succeed.

Getting ready for a first date usually entails doing the things that make you feel the most like yourself, such as listening to your favorite music and putting on an outfit you know will flatter your figure. Think about doing the same things before going on a date with yourself. Especially if you are new to self-dating, don't just do things to make the time feel special; do things to make it feel natural and comfortable as well.

Let yourself enjoy yourself.

Giving yourself a treat could change the way you feel about time alone. Start with small things like a face mask, a candle, or a long shower. You can work your way up to a dinner or museum trip by yourself if that seems scary at first. Part of what makes something feel indulgent is whether or not you would do it every day. Or is it something different?

Mastering the self-date is, all in all, a way to get to know yourself. Make it something you'll look forward to, like going for a walk, taking a book to a bar, or going to a movie by yourself. You'll find that you're a pretty good date if you make time for yourself, which feels like a small luxury.

Photo by Kirk Thornton: https://www.pexels.com/photo/photo-of-woman-sitting-on-lakeside-14924840/

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