I have always heard people discuss mom guilt, but I never truly understood the full picture until I heard women cry, saying they wished they had been much happier in those early days after giving birth. They spoke of the constant feeling of not doing enough, of not being a “good mom." I mean, imagine a newborn who can’t even speak, and the mother already feeling guilty—then imagine a society full of people whose words cut like razors. What humanity and its impossible standards have forced mothers to endure.
While reading this book, I asked myself, how many times have I felt guilty for something I shouldn't have? How many times have I said no, knowing it was best for me, yet still carried guilt? How many times have I decided to look the other way because I couldn’t fix a situation? When I choose to put myself first in situations that demand it with adults, the feeling of guilt still creeps in—but I refuse to pay it attention.
Now, imagine the moms with babies who can’t even speak. That guilt is amplified, constant, and relentless.
Zoe Blaskey’s Become the Happiest Mum with Motherkind isn’t your typical “how-to” parenting guide—it’s raw, unfiltered, and painfully honest. From the first pages, Zoe speaks as if she’s sitting across from you, leaning in with a cup of tea and saying things that most mums whisper only to themselves in the dark. She doesn’t sugarcoat the chaos, the guilt, or the exhaustion. She calls out the lie that motherhood is always blissful, and she admits the parts no one talks about: the rage that bubbles up when your toddler won’t sleep, the self-loathing after a harsh word, the endless comparisons that eat at your confidence.
One of the most striking things Zoe says—something that flew under the radar for many readers—is that happiness as a mom isn’t about being perfect or ticking boxes. She doesn’t just tell you to “self-care” or “meditate”; she forces you to confront the uncomfortable truth that a lot of your unhappiness comes from the stories you tell yourself about what a “good mom" should be. She writes, in the clearest, almost brutal terms: “Stop pretending. Stop performing. You don’t have to be liked by every mother or meet Instagram standards. Your kids need a real human, not a perfect image.”
The lessons in this book are layered and deeply practical, even if they don’t always feel neat. Zoe teaches boundaries without guilt, self-compassion without excuses, and joy without needing validation from others. She reminds mums that anger, frustration, and imperfection are not failures—they are part of life and part of connection with your child. And she doesn’t shy away from her own missteps, sharing intimate moments that make you feel seen, understood, and not alone.
I recommend this book not because it promises a magic formula or instant transformation, but because it reminds you of something far more valuable: being a happy, present mom is a messy, ongoing journey, and you don’t need to hide the mess. If you’re tired of the shiny, curated motherhood advice and want something real—honest, compassionate, and sometimes harshly true—this book will speak to you like few others can.
Zoe Blaskey doesn’t just teach; she validates, confronts, and challenges. This book is a lifeline for anyone who’s ever felt like they’re failing at motherhood when, in reality, they’re just living it.
Grab a copy on Amazon.



Ein sehr eindrucksvoller und ehrlicher Beitrag. Besonders die Beschreibung dieser allgegenwärtigen Schuldgefühle hat mich nachdenklich gemacht. Wie stark gesellschaftliche Erwartungen wirken können, wird hier sehr deutlich.
ReplyDeleteMir gefällt, dass das Buch offenbar keinen einfachen Trost bietet, sondern dazu ermutigt, sich mit den eigenen Ansprüchen und inneren Bildern auseinanderzusetzen. Gerade dieser Gedanke, dass „glücklich sein“ nichts mit Perfektion zu tun hat, ist sehr wertvoll.
Danke für diese differenzierte und berührende Rezension. Sie regt wirklich zum Nachdenken an.
You are welcome. Glad you felt that way.
DeleteThanks for sharing
ReplyDeleteYou are welcome.
DeleteThis book sounds realistic and honest about Mom guilt ~ thanks, hugs ^_^
ReplyDeleteYou are welcome.
DeleteMany thanx.
ReplyDeleteGod bless.
You are welcome.
Delete不要太在意別人的想法自己會快樂多一點.
ReplyDeleteThat is very true but I noticed that most people were trained to care and unlearning that habit is the right step to happy life. Thank you, Philip.
DeleteParece un buen libro. Gracias por la reseña. Te mando un beso.
ReplyDeleteI would say it is because motherhood is alot and she wrote a book of ease.
DeleteI wish I had that book when I was younger
ReplyDeleteOh dear, I can feel every word. Such a great book.
DeleteThis book seems grounded in the realities of what motherhood is all about, Melody. We shouldn't compare ourselves to others, but simply love this precious bundle of joy and challenge that God has blessed us with. I tried to do that with both of mine with all my heart, and I don't regret one moment. Blessings!
ReplyDeleteThat's right, Martha. We need to focus on ourselves and stop comparing ourselves. It's an intentional decision to make.
DeleteОчень хорошее описание книги. И очень важные слова, написанные автором.
ReplyDeleteМне удалось только немного облегчить это чувство вины после работы с психологом. Но было бы гораздо легче, если бы психолог появился у меня ещё до рождения детей. Профилактика всегда легче, чем лечение.
Oh dear, you made a very good point. Having one before having a child is one of the best things one can do.
DeleteTrying to live up to expectations is never easy, even for mothers.
ReplyDeleteThat is right.
DeleteMost interesting Melody.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteMotherhood is a Lifelong Journey even once they're Grown, you never Stop being a Parent. I once had a Friend that was in her Seventies, I knew her Mom, who was in her 90's, her Mom said something I never forgot. That her 75 Year Old Daughter was still her "Child", and what she felt from Day One of giving Birth, didn't just End at Maturity of that Child. I've Raised Two Generations now and man is that ever the Truth. Every Child is a unique Individual and so is every Parent, we have to often embrace the Beautiful Messes we all just are and experience whatever Life hands us in the Journey. We can't be Called to Perfection when we're all just Imperfect Human Beings, doing the best we can, and often failing at some of it. I tried never to take all the blame for failures of my Kiddos, nor all the credit for their successes. Guilt can be such a heavy burden to bear and Life can be a lot of baggage to unpack. This sounds like a very good Book.
ReplyDeleteSome forget that some parents are always there for their kids, but society has exploited motherhood to the point that expectations are unrealistic. I hope this book reaches more people, not just mothers but men too, because some of them downgrade motherhood, which is sad. Oh, that was such a sweet moment from her mom and she 's right. Many people need to read your comment and thank you so much for your honest words.
DeleteQue livro interessante para a verdadeira e real análise da maternidade.
ReplyDeleteNada é como está evidenciado no Instagram, com histórias bonitas e emocionantes...A maternidade real é dolorida, pragmática e difícil demais!! Cuidar de uma pessoa desde o nascimento é complicado , são personalidades distintas para se adequarem.
Melody, gostei muito da sua análise do livro da Zoe. São pessoas reais e não de fantasia falando para pessoas reais.
Beijos e um lindo final de semana!
Taking care of oneself can be difficult, and then taking care of another person. I mean, motherhood can be beautiful; people also forget support systems. I am glad you enjoyed the book. I hope you get to read it.
DeleteHave a nice day!
ReplyDeleteWishing you the same.
DeleteI think I'm glad I became a mother in the days before the Internet and Social Media. I think all those things add to the performance pressure
ReplyDeleteI totally understand you, but inasmuch as that is happening, people can choose what to post and what to take. You even see on social media that people post their parenting habits, and sometimes it looks so unreal, but we need to scroll and pass. The guilt many mothers face can be so hard to communicate in words.
DeleteDeve ser um bom livro. Obrigada pela sugestão.
ReplyDeleteUm beijo.
You are welcome.
DeleteCreo entender que la autora intenta decir a quien lee el libro aquello que una madre dría a su hija que tiene un bebe por primera vez y en esos momentos no sabe muy bien que hacer. Eso es algo que se hacía antes cuando las familias no se desperdigaban tanto como ahora y a falta de esa trasmisión de conocimientos se buscan en redes y no siempre se encuentra información veraz.
ReplyDeleteSaludos.
I hope people are able to locate the right information about motherhood. The guilt that mother faces—and whichever way that child comes, she deserves to be supported and cared for because motherhood is a journey.
DeleteI am so grateful I didn't have children of my own. It took a long while to say that, but I would have passed onto them a genetic disease gene as a carrier. And I wouldn't have been able to handle it. I was lucky to be able to "share" Rick's boys who were seven and nine when I met them. I'm lucky to share the grands. But as close as our relationship is, in many ways I'm relieved they are not of my blood. I worry about the world they and their children will be living in.
ReplyDeleteI totally understand you and I am glad made a choice that suits you.
DeleteI must tell my friend about this book. :)
ReplyDeleteI hope the person finds it useful. Thank you.
DeleteI think there must be more pressure nowadays with all the social media which I didn't have when my children were little.
ReplyDeleteI totally agree but there are unrealistic expectations flying around.
DeleteYou read the best books. You’re not afraid to tackle issues with what you read.
ReplyDeletersrue.blogspot.com
Well, we are all in our own space in this world, and little do we know how what we share can go a long way.
DeleteBoa noite minha querida amiga Melody. Obrigado pela resenha e dica literária. Aproveito para desejar, uma excelente primavera e um bom final de semana. Grande abraço do seu amigo e irmão, em Cristo, do Brasil.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Luiz. Wishing you the same.
DeleteMy mom days are over (well always a mom, but now that my daughter is an adult I'm a mom in a different way), but you hit the nail on the head when you spoke about how society can make you feel guilty for things you shouldn't feel guilty about. Whether it's with a child or just in life sometimes. Nice review. I enjoyed reading it. hugs-Erika
ReplyDeleteThank you for taking the time to read and share your view, Erika. Glad you have more time to yourself. Keep blossoming and have the best times.
DeleteLearning about setting boundaries and dealing with guilt sounds like good reading for new moms and everyone in general. Something we all need to learn to deal with. Must be a useful book.
ReplyDeleteYou are right; boundaries play a beneficial role.
DeleteInteresting book. I like that it talks about real motherhood and not a sugarcoated and embellished version. I think every motherhood experience is different and should be very personal; comparisons don't help in this This is a stage of life that every mother should experience without having to meet other people's expectations, that's what I think. And let's not romanticize it, because motherhood is challenging in any circumstance and requires strength and sacrifice.
ReplyDeleteThe amount of romanticizing motherhood and posting or sharing what looks like ease is crazy; this is why some people who have never had kids talk down on the efforts mothers make because they think it's all bliss and chill like Instagram.
DeleteBeing a mum is a truly rewarding experience with some heartbreak and tears tossed in
ReplyDeleteI agree with you. Mums do a lot, and their efforts often go unrecognized, especially when they have children with the wrong partners.
DeleteBardzo dobra książka. Powinnam ją przeczytać jako matka trójki dzieci. Nieraz było mi bardzo ciężko, bo ocenialy mnie inne matki, które nic nie wiedziały o moich problemach, życiu. Zdarzało się że ktoś bezpodstawnie zgłosił mnie do Opieki Społecznej. Naprawdę okropne uczucie. Wiele razy płakałam z powodu innych matek, a siebie obwiniałam, mówiłam, że widocznie jestem kiepską matką skoro tak jest. Być matką to ciężka rola. Chyba najtrudniejsza. Dziękuję, że poleciłas tę książkę. Z recenzji wynika, że będzie dobra dla wielu mam. Pozdrawiam najserdeczniej Kochana
ReplyDeleteMuy buena reseña. Hay mujeres que sufren depresión pos parto y otras se sienten culpables como bien explica el libro. Parece necesaria su lectura sobretodo para quienes desean o son madres.
ReplyDeleteUn abrazo
That's right, and the list goes on. But one thing everyone should stay away from is guilt-tripping mothers.
DeleteInteresting book.
ReplyDeleteMelody, I'll tell you, I too felt guilty about something, even though I shouldn't be angry with myself. I also said "no" many times, knowing it was best for me, but I felt bad, I was sad, I was dissatisfied. I'm also a living example of how I sometimes gave up, walked away because I couldn't do something, I was afraid I'd do something wrong.
Melody, I wish you a good new week!!!
I have come to understand that prioritizing logic is among the most beneficial actions I can take for myself, as there are times when circumstances are beyond my control, and individuals are persistently passing judgment.
DeleteMotherhood is one thing no one prepares you for.. it changes constantly and no two people have the same experience. Sounds like quite the book. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteYou are totally right.
DeleteI'm sure we all feel guilty for something. We didn't do or have control over.
ReplyDeleteThat's right, but motherhood guilt hits differently, as mothers feel that some moments can never be reclaimed or given back. It's just a whole lot more.
DeleteSer padres en los tiempos que corren no es fácil, pero ese instinto es dar cariño, amor y protección al recién nacido, y educación y valores. No todos están preparados para ser padres y madres.
ReplyDeleteUn besote, feliz semana.
The reality is that not everyone is ready to be a parent.
DeleteUn invito potente a liberarsi dal senso di colpa e ad abbracciare una maternità vera, imperfetta e profondamente umana.
ReplyDeleteBuona giornata
That is right, Silvia.
DeleteWooo
ReplyDeletehow interesting book
Thanks for sharing it with us!
Hugs