A study of 975 adults in the United Kingdom explored the intensity of various types of bereavement. The results revealed that for 21% of participants who had lost both humans and pets, the death of their animal companion was the most distressing experience of their lives, even when compared to the loss of close friends or family members.
Furthermore, the study found that approximately 7.5% of grieving pet owners met the criteria for prolonged grief disorder, a condition where debilitating distress lasts for a year or longer. This rate is remarkably similar to the frequency of prolonged grief seen after the loss of a sibling or a partner.
It is essential to recognize that this type of loss can have tangible health consequences, including headaches, dizziness, and chronic fatigue. For those experiencing deep, lasting sorrow, seeking professional counseling is a necessary step in the healing process. Validating this grief is the first step toward recovery.
In some ways the passing of my cat was harder than the deaths of my parents. I think it is because animals can’t say goodbye. They seem innocent.
ReplyDeleteYou have left some nice comments at mine, Thank you.
I understand you. For some people, losing a pet is incredibly difficult, and the bond they have can run very deep, which is completely understandable.
DeleteFor me, I would definitely feel the loss of a human more, but I can still respect how meaningful that connection with a pet can be.
I’m really sorry about your cat.
Olá, tudo bem?
ReplyDeleteInteressante esse assunto. Eu já perdi alguns cachorros, pois sempre tenho algum comigo, mas confesso que não fiquei de luto como se fosse alguém da família. Procuro manter uma certa distância emocional dos meus pets, pois não os considero no mesmo patamar que um filho, uma esposa, uma mãe. Mas tenho visto que hoje em dia muitas pessoas estão profundamente ligadas aos seus pets ao mesmo tempo em que se afastam das pessoas. Não sei até que ponto isso é saudável.
Um abraço.
I can never equate a dog to a human. I understand that pets are a part of people's lives, and I totally respect that. However, I am surprised at Anvilcloud's comment, but I understand that people feel things differently. A dog is not a child and can never replace a child. People can act as if they are, say it, or try to follow whatever they want, but a dog is not a child. To me, that is a delusion that needs mental assessment. Everything has its place, and when things start getting mixed up, people begin acting crazy.
DeleteHi Melody, it's very painful to lose our pets; when my dear cat passed away, I felt lost. Thank you so much for your visit to my blog and for your comment, see you soon :)
ReplyDeleteLosing a beloved pet is an incredibly heartbreaking experience, and I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your cat.
DeletePets are part of the family, and losing them is like losing a family member. And I don't see humans as any more or less valuable than our pets. Pets aren't people, but they are like children in many ways. They would never replace my child for example, but they are my babies and I enjoy my time with them a lot. Have you ever had a pet? Just curious since you write about the loss. Have a great rest of your day.
ReplyDeleteHumans are inherently more valuable than pets. While pets can provide emotional support and a sense of companionship, they are fundamentally animals with their own distinct roles and capabilities. Unlike humans, pets cannot drive themselves to the hospital in an ambulance, perform surgery, or fight in wars. They also cannot cook for disabled individuals, highlighting the unique contributions and complexities of human life. While some may develop a strong emotional bond with their pets, treating them as children, it's crucial to acknowledge that they are not, and never can be, human, regardless of the training they receive.
DeleteThat being said, the loss of a beloved pet can be devastating. I grew up in a household with numerous dogs, at one point having up to six. Despite this, I never formed the deep connection that my brother and father shared with them. While they clearly loved and cared for the dogs, they never referred to them as children or equated them to humans. This experience has led me to believe that as humans, we need to establish clear boundaries between what we want things to be and what they realistically are. Maintaining a clear sense of reality is extremely important. Thank you for your contribution, Erika.
Such a powerful and meaningful post. I really appreciate how you validate the depth of pet loss, because the bond we share with them is real, and the grief can be just as intense as losing a loved one. It’s comforting to see this kind of understanding and compassion expressed so openly.
ReplyDeleteKisses
Hi Joanna, thanks so much for taking the time to read this post. I sincerely appreciate it. I do believe that losing a pet can be an intense experience, but I don't wholeheartedly equate it to losing a human loved one. I respect and validate the feelings of those who do feel that way, but personally, I don't share that exact sentiment. Losing a pet undoubtedly takes a significant emotional toll on a person. However, I maintain that the pain of losing a person is distinct. I've experienced the loss of my sister, and we also lost my dad's dog. I have never dwelled on the dog's passing; my sister is constantly on my mind. I wonder what life would be like right now. I have never cried or shed a tear for my dad's dog, even though it was with us for years. So, personally, they are not comparable. That being said, I absolutely agree that losing a pet can be devastating.
DeleteHi Melody, oh the grief is real. I've always had a deep connection to all my fur babies. Losing them was one of the hardest things I've had to deal with. I still miss my very first cat.
ReplyDeleteI am truly sorry to hear about that, Duni. I wish you all the very best.
DeleteIt's very true Melody. We in this house lost two dogs and my mother all in the one year - such a sad and grieving time for all of us.
ReplyDeleteOh dear, I am so incredibly sorry to hear about this; it sounds like an overwhelming amount to deal with and process all at once. Sending you so much strength and love to help you get through this difficult time.
DeleteMe hiciste pensar en eso, porque para mi, analizando esos sentimientos...me sabe a tener un apego muy grande a una especie que te da confort personal...yo no tengo mascotas, no desarrolle ese apego permanente, aunque tuve si algun perruno que me acompaño en la niñez y adulto joven, pero se fueron y cuando se fueron siendo niña, comprendí que ellos no son eternos y que igual que nosotros se mueren y lo sentimos en su momento, pero después tenemos otros y así la vida sigue...como sea el amor dependiente que tienen algunos con sus mascotas se entiende , cada quien valora y por voluntad propia quiere depositar su querer ahi...y es de esperar que ese amor bien habido sirva para saber tener sanas relaciones con sus iguales, porque muchos aman a mascotas, pero andan de maltratadores con sus semejantes...el ser humano es muy increible en como se apondera de la vida y se justifica en sus acciones...
ReplyDeleteHay que aprender mejor de saber bien como amar y desapegarse en bien de todo ello.
Te dejo un abrazo.
I think pets are great for the people who choose to keep them; they have their reasons for doing so, and I believe it is perfectly fine to have them. However, one thing I have noticed is that some owners do not stop at simply having a pet as a pet. The reality is that an animal will always be an animal, whether it is trained or untrained, regardless of how much people might wish or delusionally believe that the animal is like a child. Honestly, I think equating a pet to a child is very degrading to the human race as a whole, which is simply my personal take and a matter of common sense. Pets are wonderful, and while I know that people experience genuine grief when they lose one, I will not pretend that I can personally relate to that specific feeling. Furthermore, when pet owners claim that dogs or cats are better than humans, I truly do not see how that comparison holds any weight; that kind of statement feels entirely unnecessary. That said, I do recognize that the grief felt for a pet is valid, and those who have such a deep connection with their pet companion deserve support and empathy from the people around them.
DeleteIf you really love your pet than I can understand this. As for me..I don´t have this experience because I do not have pets and never had...and I never will. That simply is not my thing.
ReplyDeleteHave a good time and thanks for your always so kind visits to my blogs.
Violetta
Hi Violetta, I do not have any pets either and I will be very sincere that I simply cannot relate. I shared this post for awareness so people can learn about the study. I believe that animals and wildlife in general should be protected, but I honestly cannot relate to animal grief being compared to the loss of a human life, though I suppose people’s feelings are their own. Will I own a pet one day? I do not know, maybe. Will I be close to that pet? Maybe. But will I ever think of a pet as my child? Never, not on this God-given earth of ours.
DeleteOi Melody, um texto muito importante sobre o sofrimento provocado pela perda de um animal de estimação. É realmente muito dolorido e demora a passar. Eu perdi uma gatinha há muitos anos, ela era minha companheira de vida. Fiquei arrasada, foi difícil demais de superar.
ReplyDeletePor isso que até hoje não consegui ter outra gatinha ou cãozinho: meu coração não suportaria outra perda.
Beijos e uma ótima semana!!
I’m so sorry to hear that, Adriana; it’s a lot to go through. I am sending all my love and support always.
DeleteYes, pets are members of our family. I had a German Shepherd who got sick and died at the age of 12, there's not a day that goes by that I don't think of him.
ReplyDeleteI agree that pets can be considered part of people's families. I am glad you shared that and hope it gets better every day. Wishing you all the best, Stara.
DeleteI have a very large furry zoo and in recent years we have had at least one loss per year. Whoever tells me that it is not the same as losing a family member, I can assure you that it is not true; to me, they are like family, actually even closer. Then I always say that I will not take any more animals, but then there is always some needy animal and we cannot turn our backs, and we are adopted by a new animal. At the moment I say that when the current zoo is all in heaven I will not have any more animals, then we will see what happens in the future!
ReplyDeleteOh Jules, I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your pet. Even though we don't share the same perspective on this, I truly believe your grief is completely valid. While I agree that animals are in need of help, I would personally choose to spend my money supporting a human child or an adult in need, as I believe that kind of support goes a long way. I still wish you and your remaining pets many good times together and all the best with your zoo.
DeleteAn extremely hard situation, Melody. We have an already mature dog and we don't want to think about it.
ReplyDeleteHave a nice day, my friend.
Oh dear, Giannis, that really must be a difficult situation to deal with. I truly wish you a sound mind and good health, and I am sending all the best love to you and your mature dog during this time.
DeleteI agree. When we lost our precious Little Bit in 2015 I cried and cried for weeks and weeks. They are family members.
ReplyDeleteHave a blessed day and week. ♥
So sorry to hear about this; it sounds like such a challenging process to go through. I sincerely hope you are feeling better with each passing day. Dealing with the grief and loss of whatever we hold dear to our hearts can be incredibly difficult.
DeletePets are so much part of the family and the bond between human and pet is strong, any loss is greatly felt.
ReplyDeleteAll the best Jan
I completely agree that experiencing any kind of loss is incredibly difficult to navigate and deal with.
DeleteResearch also indicates that interpersonal bonds are weakening, and that, generally speaking, we are drifting apart. Families are choosing not to have children or, for various reasons, are postponing parenthood until later. For many couples and single individuals, pets have become part of the family and faithful companions. That is why the loss is so painful. Personally, for a very long time, I could not bring myself to welcome a new animal friend into my life.
ReplyDeleteBest regards.🤗🫶
I have a lot to say about pets, which is a topic with two sides. Pets depend on the humans who care for them, so they have no choice but to be loyal, even though some remain wild. All the same, pets are particularly beneficial in different ways.
DeleteThis is very true. As a retired Vet Tech I have seen the grief in people after the death of a pet. In my own family Mr. M. and I have had several pets that crossed the Rainbow bridge. After the last one we decided not to have pets again.
ReplyDeleteOh dear, thank you so much for sharing that with me. It sounds like that must have been an incredibly difficult experience to navigate, but I truly believe your decision might be for the best in the long run. What matters most is that you are doing okay and are growing stronger with each passing day.
DeleteBeen there! I told many people that losing Olga was worse than losing my parents. For one thing, my parents were both very old and understood what was happening to them. But I felt like Olga, though also old (for a dog), was looking to me to make things better, and my inability to do so felt like a failure. Pets are so utterly dependent on us, and also focus all their attention on us, so it's not surprising that combination generates an intense feeling of loss when they do finally go.
ReplyDeleteSteve, I personally do not share that same view. While we have had several dogs throughout our lives, my sister's death remains a deeply painful part of me that still feels raw and confusing to navigate. I would never compare the death of a human being—especially a parent or sibling—to that of a pet, as I believe those are two experiences that should never be placed in the same category. However, as humans, we are entitled to our feelings, and if that is how you truly feel, I thank you for sharing it with me. You mentioned that pets are dependent on us, while other pet owners believe that animals contribute to society in the same way humans do. Well, to each their own. Thank you for sharing your perspective, Steve; I sincerely appreciate it. I wish you continuous calm always.
DeleteI went through pet grieve many times... :(((
ReplyDeleteI can only imagine the depth of the pain you must have felt, and I am truly glad that you felt comfortable enough to share your experience. I hope and pray that you continue your journey toward healing, as I know it is certainly not an easy process to go through.
DeleteCada persona creo que mostramos nuestros sentimientos de una manera ante la perdida de un familiar o amigo y la perdida de una mascota.
ReplyDeleteYo creo que cuando peor estuve fue cuando murió un amigo a los 20 años en accidente de trafico. Incluso peor que cuando murió mi padre que un cáncer de páncreas se lo llevo en un mes, creo que me afecto mas en la salud ya que tengo problemas de tiroides y de tener controlado a un descontrol total.
Aunque en casa siempre hubo perros para el manejo del ganado no recuerdo de que se moriría alguno si que recuerdo de uno muy enfermo cuando era pequeño.
Saludos.
Oh Thomas, that is truly so much to take in; it is an incredibly difficult thing to process, but I want to thank you for feeling comfortable enough to share this with me today. Grief is a complex journey; some emerge from it, while others carry it forever. I’m glad you shared, as it shows positivity. I am praying for God’s protection over you, and I truly wish you the very best always.
DeleteMy sister-in-law called her kiddos out of school when their cat died. The school wasn't so understanding when she said the death was of a pet and not a relative.
ReplyDeleteHumm, honestly, this is a complex situation to navigate, as different people process and understand these events in their own unique ways, and every one of their feelings remains completely valid. I truly hope the kids are doing great, and I wish all the best to their entire family during this time.
DeleteMelody, thank you for your text. Your words mean so much to me… Even though my beloved kitten disappeared in early April 2025, I want to believe that he's alive, healthy, not hungry, happy, and that he'll come back to her and my parents someday!
ReplyDeleteMelody, I send you my regards and wish you a happy week!
I remember reading your post about your cat Anna; that was such a difficult time for you, but I am really happy to see you staying so positive about the whole situation. I truly hope your cat comes back home soon. If I remember correctly, the name of your cat is Muzrik—I’m not entirely sure if I have the spelling right—but I hope it returns to you safe, healthy, and perfectly fine. Sending all my love to you, Anna!
DeleteDear Melody,
DeleteThank you for your beautiful and kind words!!!!!!
Sending you my heart!
For most people losing a pet is the same as losing a family member and can cause a lot of heartache and tears
ReplyDeleteI understand where you're coming from, and like I said, I don’t think it’s the same as losing a family member. I’d even go as far as to say it really isn't the same to me—but I still know that losing a pet can be an incredibly hard and devastating experience.
DeleteOh yes, so very sad when a pet dies!! They are part of the family.
ReplyDeleteYes, it is indeed a very difficult and emotional process for many pet owners to navigate.
Delete唔計那些沒良心的主人,寵物就如家人一樣,過世怎會不傷心.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree; the process of losing a pet is incredibly difficult and emotionally draining.
DeleteIt very sad when pet pass on.
ReplyDeleteSo sad
DeleteI agree with this reflection. A few months ago, our family pet, who had been with us for 14 years, died. We miss him and feel a void that cannot be filled. We have to process the grief and find acceptance. Pets can be like our little brothers, at least that's how we feel at home.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing. Rebecca, I pray that you and your family find peace throughout this process and that your hearts may find calm. I wish you all the very best.
DeleteWooo
ReplyDeleteReally interesting post, thanks fo sharing it with us
Have a nice day, a good end of the month and beginning of the new one
Hugs ♡
Thank you so much, Naya.
DeleteI am quite sure I would suffer the same regardless if it was a close person or a pet that was to die.
ReplyDeleteGrief can be incredibly hard. I truly hope that those who are currently going through such difficult times find the support they need to heal and eventually get well.
DeleteThank you for a caring post.
ReplyDeleteGod bless.
You are welcome.
DeleteThis is such an important topic to discuss. Pet loss can be extremely painful and difficult to move forward from. Thank you for highlighting the impacts.
ReplyDeletePet loss can be incredibly painful.
DeleteMelody, this is such a timely post for me. Two of my close relatives recently lost their dogs. Although all the family members are sad, my cousin's husband can't seem to get over the loss. It is very difficult when the pet has been in the family for years.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this, Judee. I am so sorry to hear about your relatives’ loss. Losing a pet after so many years together can be heartbreaking, especially when they become such an important part of daily life. Grief affects everyone differently, and it is understandable that your cousin’s husband is struggling deeply with it. Wishing comfort and healing to your whole family during this difficult time.
DeleteI've put off reading this for a few days because at this time of the year, pet loss is a trigger for me, having said farewell to the Marmelade Gypsy back in 2012 in May. These days -- the right-now days -- we were traveling and so worried he might not wait for us to return. Now I look at Lizzie, still OK but in early stages of kidney failure and losing weight. Nothing imminent but it reminds me of how deep the loss. There are family members who have passed that I have mourned less than Gypsy and I have no guilt about that, because he was a family member too, and one with whom I spent nearly every day of his life.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing something so personal, Jeanie. Gypsy was clearly deeply loved, and it is completely understandable that this time of year brings those memories and emotions back so strongly. I am sorry to hear about Lizzie’s health struggles as well. Even when nothing feels immediate, those reminders can stir up old grief all over again. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with mourning a beloved pet as deeply.
DeleteWishing you and Lizzie many peaceful and comforting moments together.
Dói saber que não veremos mais uma amigo e é isso o que os cachorros que perdi representaram. Sim, são bichos, mas na maioria das vezes possuem virtudes admiráveis, que muitos humanos negligenciam, como a fidelidade.
ReplyDeleteOportuna reflexão, Melody.
Bom fim de semana.
Thank you, Cesar. I think you expressed it beautifully.
DeleteI certainly agree. I don't know if you saw my post, but I recently lost my Chihuahua Rat Terrier mix dog. We had Rossy for 19 years, so my daughters were in their early teens. I used my artwork as part of the grieving process, and that was very helpful. Blessings!
ReplyDeleteInk clearly left a deep imprint on your life, and it’s moving how you still carry him with you. Wishing you all the best.
DeleteI haven't gotten over the death of my cat, Ink. He passed in 2016. I was owned by him for 19 years. I was his heart and he was my soul. Even though I have two other cat overlords now, I still miss Ink.
ReplyDeleteLosing a companion like Ink after so many years leaves a mark that doesn’t simply fade with time. Wishing you strength.
DeleteI feel this one deeply, Melody. Our sweet cat Draino passed away in late February and I still think about her everyday, still have tears, and I'm not sure I'll ever get over it. We lost Pepper, our other cat, a couple years prior and it's honestly really hard even now without her - but thankfully we still had another sweet fur baby with us until February. It's just so hard, it's a very real grief just like losing precious family.
ReplyDeleteMake Life Marvelous