tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post7675419193325531325..comments2024-03-29T08:58:21.628+00:00Comments on Melody Jacob: What is the best way to end a relationship with a violent, controlling and obsessive partner?MELODY JACOBhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05028937757407238470noreply@blogger.comBlogger100125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-39753794863445789752022-03-09T15:51:27.869+00:002022-03-09T15:51:27.869+00:00Unfortunately that is likely not possible with a c...Unfortunately that is likely not possible with a controlling, obsessive partner. They are used to wanting to control everything and if they are obsesssed with you they will not take this well. The best you can do is prepare yourself for an angry and vengeful partner.My3rdEyeSeesBesthttps://www.quora.com/profile/My3rdEyeSeesBest?__nsrc__=4noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-59832397685142045492022-03-09T15:49:48.644+00:002022-03-09T15:49:48.644+00:00You pack your bags and disappear. But you have to ...You pack your bags and disappear. But you have to plan. Make sure you have all your legal things straightened out. Make sure you have money and a safe place to go to. Make sure you don’t have any reason to go back. Some people are just too violent, volatile and unpredictable. They do not understand what peaceful and amicable is. Just be ready and leave quietly. I hope you find your peace and happiness. Take care.Paulyn Bellohttps://www.quora.com/profile/Paulyn-Bellonoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-50848056719068285002022-03-07T17:18:15.081+00:002022-03-07T17:18:15.081+00:00Leave them a note and don't turn back. Otherwi...Leave them a note and don't turn back. Otherwise they will lash you with guilt or try to get you back.Miss Rosie Ehttps://www.quora.com/profile/Miss-Rosie-Enoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-42467166554506539132022-03-07T17:17:11.698+00:002022-03-07T17:17:11.698+00:00Sometimes it is not possible, when the person is t...Sometimes it is not possible, when the person is that volatile…often they react in anger and abusive treatment. Sometimes people have to set up a secret escape route, pack a bag and hide it or place it at a friend’s home, in case you really need to bolt. Before you do anything, make sure you have a support system standing by…family, friends, or even professional help, if necessary. You might want to have somebody with you when you break the news if you are afraid of an explosive reaction. Be prepared they may try to break you down, tell you how everything is your fault, and you just didn’t do bla bla bla, they would not act like that…that’s typical too. You need to be honest and explain why you can no longer tolerate the relationship. Abusers greatest fear is being left, so that islikely to trigger extreme emotions. Please be careful, but do get out.Iris Smaushttps://www.quora.com/profile/Iris-Smaus-1noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-65299774950517542692022-03-07T17:16:04.206+00:002022-03-07T17:16:04.206+00:00If he is harsh, controlling and obsessive, ANY kin...If he is harsh, controlling and obsessive, ANY kind of break up ís going to be difficult. That is his nature. Just plan discreetly to leave without provoking arguments. Be as diplomátic as possible KNOWING you are doing the right thing. “Peacefully" is a laudable aim. But not everyone can accept a break up peacefully. Be prepared for any kind of drama. I wish you lots of success for the future. You have suffered enough!��Susan Comptonhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Susan-Compton-32noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-36456301193307098472022-03-07T17:14:35.712+00:002022-03-07T17:14:35.712+00:00I usually just walk away. When I was younger I use...I usually just walk away. When I was younger I used to create drama make them think I’m crazy so they’d leave me alone. I’m older now and more mature so I just well I’m married so I just leave the room until they get over themselves. I like my marriage..Angelhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Angel-5061noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-39509675101982449102022-03-07T17:13:35.603+00:002022-03-07T17:13:35.603+00:00Make your plan and then act on it.
Do not discuss...Make your plan and then act on it.<br /><br />Do not discuss, just leave and if you need to remove methods of contact.<br /><br />Qof course if you have Property, kids or pets you'll need to contact but keep it short and business like.Dianahttps://www.quora.com/profile/Diana-2910noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-62546966430676438442022-03-07T17:12:24.268+00:002022-03-07T17:12:24.268+00:00Sometimes there just is no way. If you are really ...Sometimes there just is no way. If you are really worried do it in public. That can sometimes keep at least the initial outburst down. Lunch somewhere that a lot of cops eat at. Let him explode there and see what happens. No real trouble but a couple of officers having their lunch interrupted would end any anger fit he has very fast.<br /><br />Sorry officers but this is for her not you.Justin Phillipshttps://www.quora.com/profile/Justin-Phillips-445noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-16406587503254738962022-03-07T17:11:25.082+00:002022-03-07T17:11:25.082+00:00That may be difficult. Expect some drama. Be direc...That may be difficult. Expect some drama. Be direct that you don't want to pursue further this relationship. Try to stay calm if they overreact.<br /><br />Stop taking their calls and hanging out around them immediately after you declare your intentions of breaking up. Don't dawdle.<br /><br />They may make it difficult, stick to your guns and you can be free of it.James Fambioshttps://www.quora.com/profile/James-Fambiosnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-76340990196797770882022-03-07T17:10:17.332+00:002022-03-07T17:10:17.332+00:00I would say truthfully, but to be honest, whatever...I would say truthfully, but to be honest, whatever comes out of your mouth is just going to be noise, because they won't be listening to a damn word. If you get a word in edgewise, you're doing fabulous. Harsh, controlling & obsessive, is a hell of a combination. If you want your voice heard, then write a letter. If you don't give a shit, then just leave and let them figure it out on their own. However you handle it, you'll be wrong and everything will be your fault, so really, what difference does it really make.Jeremy Hermeshttps://www.quora.com/profile/Jeremy-Hermes-2noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-23084061836104451892021-06-07T09:14:34.126+00:002021-06-07T09:14:34.126+00:00Well, I would do it very carefully & around pe...Well, I would do it very carefully & around people who will have your back. Harsh, controlling & obsessive people can be very hard to get rid of. They are constantly around you. Some can become violent & sometimes we don’t have the protection we need to ensure our safety & we can’t just pick up & move away. Best thing to do is talk to him & tell him how you feel & why you wish to end the relationship. If he begs for another chance (which he probably will) and/or manipulates you into staying together you may need to do it gradually. Always have something to do that does not include him. Go out with your girlfriends & spend full days or weekends with them. Ignore his calls & if he gets angry just give him some excuse why you didn’t pick up. Do it often enough & he will eventually get the message. Sometimes you have to become a “biatch” in order to survive!Carmen Delianoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-34075419395922979502021-06-07T09:13:50.924+00:002021-06-07T09:13:50.924+00:00“goodbye, go in peace”“goodbye, go in peace”Angelo Tomasnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-65098407531679368332021-06-04T07:26:24.431+00:002021-06-04T07:26:24.431+00:00It’s better to set up meaning get a new house in a...It’s better to set up meaning get a new house in a different location and just move out no harshness no over control make it peaceful<br /><br />When they realize your freeRobin Nadilenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-15983663133864652772021-06-04T00:48:18.767+00:002021-06-04T00:48:18.767+00:00Leave the relationship and let them know the cause...Leave the relationship and let them know the causes.<br /><br />Tuan Miskinnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-31533118660736495032021-06-04T00:42:30.983+00:002021-06-04T00:42:30.983+00:00Lose their number.Lose their number.Todd Castleschouldtnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-37998227683377842992021-06-04T00:40:15.786+00:002021-06-04T00:40:15.786+00:00Just put a end to the relationshipJust put a end to the relationshipRobin Nadilenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-74671334638435040392021-06-04T00:36:23.427+00:002021-06-04T00:36:23.427+00:00Why should you do anything? It's her baby and ...Why should you do anything? It's her baby and her choice to tell you or not.Gina Davishttps://www.quora.com/profile/Gina-Davis-68noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-9249797478233315202021-06-04T00:25:36.534+00:002021-06-04T00:25:36.534+00:00get family involved (especially someone you know t...get family involved (especially someone you know they won’t cross), move out all your stuff from the place if you share a place, break things off sharp and cleanly such as “We’re over” with family/friend nearby if needed, Block everything that has contact with them, get a restraining order if necessary.<br /><br />i had to do this.Eva Hamnerhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Eva-Hamnernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-76475014821225243782021-06-01T13:49:25.508+00:002021-06-01T13:49:25.508+00:00I would honestly tell them due to their anger and ...I would honestly tell them due to their anger and control issues you dont feel like its fair for you to be put in that situation when you haven't done anything to be treated that way.MrsRegulator509 Cranehttps://www.quora.com/profile/MrsRegulator509-Cranenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-48141226823877905112021-06-01T12:46:10.410+00:002021-06-01T12:46:10.410+00:00When you are going to do it just make sure that if...When you are going to do it just make sure that if you are going to do it in person do it in a public place as you never know how the person will react. Plan when and where you are going to do it and then just cut the cord real fast, block the person from contacting you and don’t let them control you and convince you to stay. take careKimberly Hoffmanhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Kimberly-Hoffman-72noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-28339935622160540182021-06-01T12:42:48.537+00:002021-06-01T12:42:48.537+00:00Find a way to make them think that letting go and ...Find a way to make them think that letting go and breaking up is what they want and that its their choice.<br /><br />Give them the control to think they are breaking up with you.Tiggzy.Mhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Tiggzy-Mnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-51253451836605730562021-05-22T20:00:17.182+00:002021-05-22T20:00:17.182+00:00Move out and leave a note explaining that you’re n...Move out and leave a note explaining that you’re not coming back and you’re broken up. Don’t give reasons because they invite future arguments or negotiations.<br /><br />Just leave and don’t look back.<br /><br />Peace be with you.Dave Crowhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Dave-Crow-22noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-68915410759575951002021-05-22T19:59:32.246+00:002021-05-22T19:59:32.246+00:00Well … that is something that would never even int...Well … that is something that would never even interest me. I would have been gone to already. So just ask yourself what are you getting out of this relationship. If I had to guess, it is because you don’t like making decisions for yourself. You just don’t like the decisions he is making for you. In order to get out of this quagmire and stay with him … just let him know …. Sometimes you can make your own decisions and sometimes you can’t. Ask him to work eith you on this.Marty Millerhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Marty-Miller-71noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-67939613456799167102021-05-22T19:56:52.655+00:002021-05-22T19:56:52.655+00:00By waking up in the morning and remembering that y...By waking up in the morning and remembering that you are an adult, with a brain that you use every other day, without getting permission from anyone, you are not a machine that needs to be controlled, and even having it at the back of your mind that even machines controlled by human beings also lose control at times.<br /><br />You met this person as an adult of sound mind and when you decided to date them, you made up your mind and asked no one on what to do, and even as you met them you knew other people and you continued to meet other people, as they are apart of your life and if you had an interest in those people, your partner would not be apart of your life.<br /><br />And when all is said and done, tell them you need to breathe and you feel suffocated and cannot pretend, all is well, while in the actual sense you are not happy, you need to end the relationship and just find yourself and love yourself, and when the time is right, you will be able to allow people back into your space, but as at now you need to go it alone. And you would also want them to work on there weakness, when you are apart.<br /><br />Remember to break it when you are in a safe place and able to get home safely.Anna Orwahttps://www.quora.com/profile/Anna-Orwanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-37180324105760726012021-05-22T19:55:01.921+00:002021-05-22T19:55:01.921+00:00You make your plan. Expect that they will try ever...You make your plan. Expect that they will try every trick they can employ to divert your plan. So, once you have the plan in place and are ready to kick into action have as little contact as possible with the other partner. It’s right to have a conversation with them to let them know that you are leaving this relationship with them. However, it is not necessary to be face to face and it’s not necessary to follow up on texts, phone calls or social media that belabors the point.Karen Lillardhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Karen-Lillardnoreply@blogger.com