tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post1018350175040319605..comments2024-03-28T15:54:41.500+00:00Comments on Melody Jacob: What do you do if your partner with a mental disorder refuses to seek or accept help?MELODY JACOBhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05028937757407238470noreply@blogger.comBlogger38125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-8685503426620153692020-09-09T06:05:03.133+00:002020-09-09T06:05:03.133+00:00Decide if the relationship is something you want t...Decide if the relationship is something you want to remain in under those circumstances.Marvin Berman, PhDhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Marvin-Berman-PhDnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-23772007113986047902020-09-09T05:52:29.792+00:002020-09-09T05:52:29.792+00:00You leave the relationship. If there is a factor u...You leave the relationship. If there is a factor undermining the relationship - mental disorder or whatever - and your partner refuses to address it, there’s no place left to go.Steven Cody, PhDhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Steven-Cody-PhDnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-18236290199777132692020-09-08T21:47:38.427+00:002020-09-08T21:47:38.427+00:00Then you need to think about whether or not you re...Then you need to think about whether or not you really want to be with them. If someone doesn't care about their own mental health, they can't begin to care about yours. You need to rethink being with this person. Why would you want to spend your entire life with this person?? Zakiya Raineshttps://www.quora.com/profile/Zakiya-Raines?__nsrc__=4noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-67724339036235130842020-09-08T19:13:27.505+00:002020-09-08T19:13:27.505+00:00Intervention with all our good friends, family mem...Intervention with all our good friends, family members we’re close to, mental health professionals.<br />The message for my partner is there’s nothing I won’t do to get you into treatment. I’ll be there every step of the way. Your friends and family will be, too.<br />But, if you choose to reject treatment, I’m out. I’m a very good layman counselor, but I’m in over my head. You need in-patient treatment. I’ve shown you the best programs and you rejected them all. I won’t stay and watch the person I love commit slow-motion suicide.Zakkary Zoahhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Zakkary-Zoahnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-91738172444396929232020-09-07T06:18:20.376+00:002020-09-07T06:18:20.376+00:00First of all, that is a sad situation to be in. Me...First of all, that is a sad situation to be in. Mental illnesses are a whole lot and each behaves differently. So it also depends on how severe it is. By trying to encourage your partner to seek for mental help is a great sign of love and good partnership. But it becomes tougher if your partner is in denial of being in that situation. This is not only about your partner. Most people in that situation don't want to admit that they have that problem. Because they have that problem, it discourages their decision making. To them everything seems normal. Convincing them to visit a specialist is an upheaval battle. And they get afraid that they could end up in mental hospitals permanently. However, you can't think of abandoning your partner because they've refused to accept it. You try all possibilities because it's part of the vows you made on that day. You can let the doctor try to convince him or her. They are trained to do that.Godfrey Semakulahttps://www.quora.com/profile/Godfrey-Semakula?__nsrc__=4noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-69577087247349448952020-09-07T06:15:23.541+00:002020-09-07T06:15:23.541+00:00You leave! especially if it’s a violent disorder. ...You leave! especially if it’s a violent disorder. It will make you crazy trying to offset his crazy.Cristina Ibarrahttps://www.quora.com/qemail/track_click?aoid=dhVq6K0MpG4&aoty=3&aty=4&cp=1&ct=1599409596113721&et=103&id=eaeeb53f18194796a8913178f32a7b9c&request_id=4&src=1&st=1599409596123980&stories=11491967097&uid=IPP1gXRZsDF&v=0noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-76285677067776667462020-09-07T05:19:54.787+00:002020-09-07T05:19:54.787+00:00Leave, because they're in no position to be a ...Leave, because they're in no position to be a partner to anyone if they can't take responsibility for themselves. Not good for anyone.<br /><br />I do wish my ex partners had done the same sooner. I didn't enjoy the codependency for a minute. Shouldnt be any surprise that they never turned out to be the white knights they imagined themselves to be.<br /><br />I save my damn self, bitch. It's a very twisted and disgusting dynamic. What you do is you leave. Your partner will remember you as the only person to actually give a fuck when they do decide that taking full responsibility for themselves is best.Zakkary Zoahhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Zakkary-Zoahnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-49532588958112276142020-09-07T05:13:09.816+00:002020-09-07T05:13:09.816+00:00First of all, that is a sad situation to be in. Me...First of all, that is a sad situation to be in. Mental illnesses are a whole lot and each behaves differently. So it also depends on how severe it is. By trying to encourage your partner to seek for mental help is a great sign of love and good partnership. But it becomes tougher if your partner is in denial of being in that situation. This is not only about your partner. Most people in that situation don't want to admit that they have that problem. Because they have that problem, it discourages their decision making. To them everything seems normal. Convincing them to visit a specialist is an upheaval battle. And they get afraid that they could end up in mental hospitals permanently. However, you can't think of abandoning your partner because they've refused to accept it. You try all possibilities because it's part of the vows you made on that day. You can let the doctor try to convince him or her. They are trained to do that.Godfrey Semakulahttps://www.quora.com/profile/Godfrey-Semakulanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-52189760105059910392020-09-06T11:05:00.937+00:002020-09-06T11:05:00.937+00:00Get get someone can get through to him parents, sh...Get get someone can get through to him parents, shrink, friends etcMiles Hollandhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Miles-Holland-7noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-50288067336972921672020-09-06T11:00:37.348+00:002020-09-06T11:00:37.348+00:00Alright! I understand. At this point you may have ...Alright! I understand. At this point you may have to involve a professional who obviously has more experience than you. The best professional is a RELATIONSHIP COUNSELOR/THERAPIST. Who knows, there may be reasons (you don’t know) your partner is refusing help. The therapist will find out<br /><br />Now, you want to ask, what if your partner isn’t willing to go? Speak with the relationship counselor first, and let’s see how it goes<br /><br />Above all, never stop loving your partner!!!Cindy Joneshttps://www.quora.com/profile/Cindy-Jones-578noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-56047434082551200692020-09-06T10:55:11.620+00:002020-09-06T10:55:11.620+00:00Leave, because they're in no position to be a ...Leave, because they're in no position to be a partner to anyone if they can't take responsibility for themselves. Not good for anyone.Clarissa Paigehttps://www.quora.com/profile/Clarissa-Paige-4?__nsrc__=4noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-75120577561696412162020-09-03T14:14:46.757+00:002020-09-03T14:14:46.757+00:00Michelle so sorry for your Dad. He accepted care w...Michelle so sorry for your Dad. He accepted care which is a great thing to hear. MELODY JACOBhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05028937757407238470noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-44233787705091888932020-08-31T18:32:20.920+00:002020-08-31T18:32:20.920+00:00My dad had mood issues (ADD, depression) that were...My dad had mood issues (ADD, depression) that were a real challenge, but unlike the scenario you describe, he tried to do something about it. Over time how he handled his moodiness improved. (Sadly for him, the internal moodiness never improved. He just learned to ignore his bad emotions because he learned they were not reflective of reality.) My mom stayed. Probably because being of an older generation, divorce wasn’t as common. But also she applauded all of his efforts. I think staying would have to be predicated on seeking help and trying to manage the mood swings. <br /><br />Michelle<br />https://mybijoulifeonline.com Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-70178555073383221862020-08-29T09:11:19.615+00:002020-08-29T09:11:19.615+00:00Ivana you always have great words to share with us...Ivana you always have great words to share with us all and I appreciate it. These are wise words coming from you. Sometimes we can do nothing and when we try to help we start becoming a shadow of ourselves. Depression does not give some signals so protecting ourselves is more important than anything.MELODY JACOBhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05028937757407238470noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-45450052463150020852020-08-29T09:08:01.203+00:002020-08-29T09:08:01.203+00:00I am glad your relationship is in a beautiful plac...I am glad your relationship is in a beautiful place right now. Thanks for the contribution. MELODY JACOBhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05028937757407238470noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-48639436353585038642020-08-29T09:04:57.672+00:002020-08-29T09:04:57.672+00:00I do not think this is more about males, both male...I do not think this is more about males, both male and females have this mood disorders and I guess it is best to trade with care.MELODY JACOBhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05028937757407238470noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-30111308329644235532020-08-29T09:03:21.587+00:002020-08-29T09:03:21.587+00:00Well, that might the a factor in some relationship...Well, that might the a factor in some relationships or marriage, may be male or female.MELODY JACOBhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05028937757407238470noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-68857402760404281102020-08-29T09:02:14.463+00:002020-08-29T09:02:14.463+00:00I totally get your point of view and suggestion. L...I totally get your point of view and suggestion. Learning to go into a preservation mode when the atmosphere becomes toxic. The power for self protection wins it all.MELODY JACOBhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05028937757407238470noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-60329881598312689572020-08-29T08:59:19.784+00:002020-08-29T08:59:19.784+00:00A better read on this article will give you a clea...A better read on this article will give you a clearly view.MELODY JACOBhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05028937757407238470noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-62026298135792021312020-08-28T17:32:14.768+00:002020-08-28T17:32:14.768+00:00This is a very difficult question and situation, w...This is a very difficult question and situation, when one partner is depressed and has mood shifts and the other tries to help in vain. I think it is important to understand there is only as much as we can do. There is no point in two people being miserable all the time, that kind of situation doesn't help anyone. Sometimes the right thing to do is to stay with our partner and help them through difficult times and sometimes the right thing is to leave- it is not always possible to continue the relationship with a person suffering from depression. Sometimes they need professional help, sometimes we need to leave them alone, sometimes they need time until they can be in a relationship again. I think that sometimes we have to leave that relationship to preserve our own mental health. Ivana Splithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04908566377732204399noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-84661677578272242392020-08-28T08:22:39.733+00:002020-08-28T08:22:39.733+00:00I experienced something similar earlier this year ...I experienced something similar earlier this year with my partner. COVID was honestly the only thing that saved and possibly enhanced our relationship because we were forced to talk things through. Prior to that we were both far too busy for each other, let along professional help. Nyxiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17930361544180015127noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-43937791030408457272020-08-27T04:26:46.290+00:002020-08-27T04:26:46.290+00:00This is generally the behavior of males. It happen...This is generally the behavior of males. It happens sometimes with females as well. Some people love to give and help, but feel embarrassed to be helped.<br /><br />I would say do not make it worse by trying to force it on him, complain or judge. Try to be patient and work it out with each other.<br /><br />Sometimes a push from some outside source can give serious mileage in this area.Sylburn Arthurshttps://www.quora.com/profile/Sylburn-Arthurs?__nsrc__=4noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-23633597352243481682020-08-27T04:21:10.660+00:002020-08-27T04:21:10.660+00:00Leave him alone.maybe it’s his pride that he can d...Leave him alone.maybe it’s his pride that he can do or accomplish it without your help.YOU NEED TO SUPPORT AND TRUST HIM:)Carie Bascos Villonhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Carie-Bascos-Villon?__nsrc__=4noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-75285748415026082020-08-26T09:10:08.097+00:002020-08-26T09:10:08.097+00:00Great topic, Melody. For me, each situation and ea...Great topic, Melody. For me, each situation and each relationship would determine the action I take. I am super caring and loving and very sensitive to mood disorders and other mental health issues so I am always willing to help a person seek treatment when necessary. But if the mood disorder manifests in a way where I become a victim of any kind of nastiness, I go immediately into self preservation mode. I will help anyone as long as they are not abusive to me. But again, each situation will require its own evaluation to determine the best course of action. Thank you for sharing this compelling topic and linking up with me.<br /><br />Shelbee<br />www.shelbeeontheedge.com Shelbee on the Edgehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04176384234651262845noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9050242060591934043.post-40990507340774483602020-08-25T19:36:13.790+00:002020-08-25T19:36:13.790+00:00You can’t change others. You can decide what you w...You can’t change others. You can decide what you will accept in a person who is in a relationship with you. Leave if your standards are not met.Andi Alexanderhttps://www.quora.com/profile/Andi-Alexander?__nsrc__=4noreply@blogger.com